Bodi ya Mikopo ya Wanafunzi wa Elimu ya Juu Yasitisha Mikopo Kwa Wanafunzi 2,739 wa vyuo mbalimbali nchini.

 

BODI ya Mikopo ya Wanafunzi wa Elimu ya Juu (HESLB) imesitisha kwa muda mikopo kwa wanafunzi 2,739 walioshindwa kujitokeza wakati wa kuhakiki wanufaika wa mikopo hiyo. 

Aidha, imetoa siku saba kuanzia jana kwa wanafunzi ambao hawakuhakikiwa kwenda kuhakiki katika vyuo vyao, vinginevyo mikopo yao itafutwa na kutakiwa kurejesha kiasi walichokopeshwa na kuchukuliwa hatua za kinidhamu. 

Akizungumza Dar es Salaam jana, Kaimu Mkurugenzi Mtendaji wa HESLB, Jerry Sabi, alisema hatua hiyo imetokana na kuwatilia shaka wanafunzi walioshindwa kujitokeza kuhakikiwa. 

“Tumesitisha mikopo kwa wasiohakikiwa kwa sababu hatujui kama ni wanafunzi halali au hewa. Tunataka kuwahakiki pia kwa kuwa hatujui kama wakati tunahakiki wengine walikuwa wagonjwa au wamerudia mwaka au wana sababu nyingine,”alisema. 

Mei mwaka huu, Wizara ya Elimu, Sayansi,Teknolojia na Mafunzo ya Ufundi, Profesa Joyce Ndalichako, aliagiza kufanyika uhakiki kwenye taasisi za elimu ya juu nchini kubaini kama kuna uwepo wa wanafunzi wasiostahili kupata mikopo. 

Kuanzia Mei 30, mwaka huu, HESLB ilifanya uhakiki katika vyuo 26 na tayari imeshafanya uchambuzi wa uhakiki kwa vyuo 18 kati ya hivyo. 

Akizungumzia uhakiki huo, Sabi alisema ulifanywa na timu maalumu iliyoundwa na Bodi kwa kuhakikiwa mwanafunzi husika na kubaini kuwa wanafunzi 2, 739 hawakujitokeza kuhakikiwa. Aliongeza kuwa, Uchambuzi katika vyuo vinane unaendelea. 

Hata hivyo, bodi hiyo haikueleza ni wanafunzi wangapi walihakikiwa katika vyuo ambavyo kazi ya uhakiki imefanyika. Alisema bodi itafanya uhakiki wa awamu ya pili ili kujiridhisha kabla ya kuwatangaza kuwa ni wanafunzi hewa na fedha ambazo zitakuwa zimeokolewa kutokana na kuwabaini wanafunzi hao. 

Alisema majina ya wanafunzi ambao hawakujitokeza kuhakikiwa wakati wa uhakiki vyuoni yamewekwa kwenye tovuti ya Bodi na pia katika vyuo ambavyo vitafanya utaratibu wa awamu ya pili ya uhakiki. 

Alivitaja vyuo vilivyohakikiwa, kufanyiwa uchambuzi wa awali na idadi ya wanafunzi ambao hawakujitokeza kuhakikiwa kwenye mabano kuwa ni Chuo Kikuu cha Dodoma (763), Chuo Kikuu cha Katoliki Ruaha (126), Chuo Kikuu cha Mtakatifu Augustino- Mwanza( 232), Chuo Kikuu cha Mzumbe (66) na Chuo Kikuu cha Teofilo Kisaji-Mbeya (130). 

Vingine ni Chuo Kikuu cha Mtakatifu Agustino-Mbeya (21), Chuo cha Mtakatifu Yohane- Dodoma (262), Chuo Kikuu cha Mkwawa (103), Chuo Kikuu cha Iringa (100) na Chuo Kikuu cha Tiba-Bugando (43), Chuo Kikuu cha Arusha (55), Chuo Kikuu cha Jordan (128), Chuo Kikuu cha Makumira- Arusha (98), Chuo Kikuu cha Kilimo cha Sokoine (385), Chuo cha Ufundi Arusha (22), Chuo Kikuu cha Waislamu-Morogoro (130), Chuo cha Uhasibu (57) na Chuo Kikuu cha Mount Meru (17).

Mbunge Auawa kwa kupigwa Risasi na Watu wasiojulikana.

 
MBUNGE wa Bunge la Afrika Mashariki (EALA) kutoka nchini Burundi, Hafsa Mossi, ameuawa na watu wasiojulikana kwa kupigwa risasi katika mji mkuu wa Bujumbura. 

Mossi aliyewahi kuwa Waziri wa Masuala ya Afrika Mashariki katika serikali ya nchi hiyo, aliuawa jana katika barabara ya Gihosha eneo la Nyankoni. 

Taarifa zilizothibitishwa na Msemaji wa Polisi wa nchi hiyo, Pierre Nkurikiye zilisema kuwa mauaji hayo yalifanyika saa 4:00 asubuhi. Nkurikiye alisema mbunge huyo alipigwa risasi kifuani kwenye moyo na kukimbizwa katika Hospitali ya Jeshi ya Kamenge ambako baadaye alipoteza maisha. 


EALA ni chombo cha Jumuiya ya Afrika Mashariki (EAC) ambacho wanachama wake ni Kenya, Uganda, Tanzania, Rwanda, Burundi na Sudan Kusini, ukiwa ni umoja wa kikanda wenye ushirikiano wa kibiashara huku ukikusudia kuwa na sarafu moja na shirikisho moja la kisiasa. 

Mkazi wa eneo alikouawa Mbunge huyo, Achel Majabuka alisema kuwa alisikia mlio wa risasi na baadaye kuona watu wawili wakiondoka katika gari baada ya kuwatishia kwa silaha wakazi wa eneo hilo. 

Kwa upande wake, Bunge la Afrika Mashariki katika taarifa yake iliyotolewa Kampala nchini Uganda, ilisema kuwa Mossi ambaye pia alikuwa Mwenyekiti wa Wabunge wa Burundi katika EALA, alipigwa risasi katika eneo la Mulanga Mashariki mwa Bujumbura. 


Alimkariri msemaji huyo wa Polisi akieleza kuwa Mossi aliuawa karibu na nyumbani kwake, huku Mbunge mwingine wa Burundi katika EALA, Emerence Bucumi akithibitisha kifo hicho. 

Spika wa Bunge la Afrika Mashariki, Daniel Kidega alilaani mauaji hayo na kumuelezea Mossi kuwa ni mchapakazi aliyekuwa amejikita kusimamia na kutetea utengamano wa ukanda huo. 

Spika huyo ambaye yuko Uganda kwa ziara ya kikazi, ameishauri Serikali ya Burundi kuwatia nguvuni mara moja wauaji wa Mossi ambaye pia aliwahi kuwa Mtangazaji wa Shirika la Utangazaji la Uingereza (BBC). 

“Ninatoa salamu za rambirambi kwa serikali, familia, marafiki na wananchi wa Burundi. Ninawaomba wawe watulivu katika wakati huu mgumu na ninaamini mamlaka husika zitafanya kazi kwa haraka kuhakikisha waliohusika na tukio hilo la kinyama wanatiwa nguvuni mara moja,” alisema Spika Kidega. 

Kwa upande wake, Rais wa Burundi, Pierre Nkurunziza alikielezea kifo cha mwanasiasa huyo kuwa ni cha kudharauliwa kwa serikali yake. Naye Katibu Mkuu wa EAC, Balozi Liberat Mfumukeko, alisema amesikitishwa na kifo hicho cha Mbunge huyo aliyeeleza alikuwa rafiki na dada na kuwa jumuiya imepoteza mwakilishi aliyekuwa akifanya kazi bila kuchoka. 

Mwaka jana, Mossi alitembelea wakimbizi wa Burundi nchini Rwanda na kulia, ameuawa wakati mazungumzo kuhusu mgogoro wa Burundi yakiwa yanaendelea kufanyika jijini Arusha. 

Alikuwa na Shahada ya Uandishi wa Habari na aliwahi kufanya kazi katika BBC na alikuwa Waziri wa Burundi wa Masuala ya Afrika Mashariki hadi Juni 2012 alipochaguliwa kuwa Mbunge wa EALA. 

Pia, aliwahi Waziri wa Mawasiliano, Habari, Mahusiano na Bunge na Msemaji wa Serikali ya Burundi kuanzia mwaka 2005 hadi 2007. 

Burundi, taifa katika Afrika Mashariki imekumbwa na ghasia na vifo kwa zaidi ya mwaka sasa. 

Mgogoro huo wenye kuendana na umwagaji damu, umesababisha watu 1,500 kuuawa, huku ukiwahusisha wafuasi wa Rais Nkurunziza na wale wanaopinga ushindi wake wa uchaguzi wa Julai, 2015 kwa mara ya tatu, wakidai kuwa ulikiuka Katiba ya nchi hiyO

Keisha kuhitimu shahada ya ununuzi na ugavi Disemba katika chuo cha CBE

 Mwanamuziki Keisha baada ya kubanwa na masomo kwa muda mrefu hali ambayo ilimfanya apate muda mchache wa kufanya muziki, hatimaye anatarajia kumaliza masomo yake mwezi Disemba mwaka huu.

Muimbaji huyo mapema mwaka jana aliambia Bongo5 kuwa yupo mwaka wa pili katika chuo cha CBE na anachukuwa shahada ya ununuzi na ugavi (Bachelor Degree in Procurement and Supplies Management).

Keisha ambaye ni mama wa watoto wawili, Jumatano hii amepost picha ya kitambulisho chake cha chuo na kuandika: Veryyyyy soon inshaAllah

Unyonyaji kidole unafaida kwa watoto- Utafiti

Image copyrightTHINKSTOCK

Image captionUnyonyaji kidole unafaida kwa watoto- Utafiti

Ripoti mpya inasema watoto wanaonyonya vidole au kung'ata kucha zao kwa meno huenda wasipate matatizo ya kuathirika kutokana na mazingira hewa au kula vyakula fulani.

Kwa mujibu wa waandishi katika jarida la Pediatrics, huo ni ni usafi dhanio,kwani yatokanayo na baadhi ya wadudu huimarisha mfumo wa kinga ya mwili.

Unyonyaji wa kidole gumba na ung’ataji wa kucha umeonekana kuzuia baadhi ya alergy.

Kati ya watu elfu moja wenye umri wa kati ya miaka mitano hadi thelathini na mbili,walifanyiwa uchunguzi kwa muda nchini New Zealand.

Lakini tabia hii ya unyonyaji vidole na ung’ataji kucha haisaidii watu wenye pumu au mtu anapopata homa kali.

Uchunguzi uliofanywa na kurekodiwa kwa watoto wenye umri wa kati ya miaka mitano na kumi na moja na wengine waliofanyiwa vipimo ni wenye umri kati ya miaka kumi na tatu na thelathini na miwili.

Huku thuluthi moja ya watoto hao ni wanyonyaji wa vidole mara kwa mara au hung’ata kucha zao na katika vipimo walivyofanyiwa watoto hao wameonekana kuwa wana kiwango kidogo cha kuathirika kutokana na mazingira hewa au kula vyakula fulani.

Image copyrightTHINKSTOCK

Image captionLakini tabia hii ya unyonyaji vidole na ung’ataji kucha haisaidii watu wenye pumu au mtu anapopata homa kali.

Watoto wanaoweza kupata matatizo ya kuathirika kutokana na mazingira hewa au kula vyakula fulani (alergy) kutokana na vitu kama vumbi kutoka majumbani,manyoya ya paka au mbwa, lakini watoto wenye kunyonya vidole gumba na kung’ata kucha walikuwa ni chini ya theluthi moja kuliko watoto wenye tabia hii ya unyonywaji vidole.

Na tabia hii ya unyonyaji vidole au ung’ataji kucha inaonekana kuwa kinga mpaka wanapofikia umri wa utu uzima.

" kuwa na paka au mbwa majumbani,ndugu au jamaa wanaofanya kazi mashambani pia imeonekana kuwa ni sababu kubwa inayosababisha mazingira ya ukuaji wa magonjwa yanayosababishwa na

kuathirika kutokana na mazingira hewa au kula vyakula fulani.

BBC

Kim Kardashian Gave Kourtney the Ultimate Birthday Present;Find Out What It Was

Sister, sister! Kim Kardashian gifted her sister Kourtney with a sweet, nostalgic birthday present for her 37th birthday back in April, and Keeping Up With the Kardashians captured the moment in a never-before-seen clip.

In the video, Kim, 35, Kourtney, and their pals are dining in Iceland when the Selfish author presents Kourtney with a gift bag. Inside, the eldest Kardashian sister finds a Snoopy Snow-Cone Machine, a relic from their childhood.

Kourtney Kardashian's Body Evolution

“All we wanted to do was go to MJ’s house,” Kim explains to everyone around the table as Kourtney smiles and turns the present over in her hands. “My grandma worked and my grandpa didn’t, so my grandpa would sit at home with us and make those with us all day long. All we wanted was a Snoopy snow cone.”

“That is so cute!” Kourtney exclaims, adding with a slight eyebrow raise, “We should make it for the hot tub later.”

During the birthday dinner, Khloé, 32, calls in via FaceTime and explains to Kourtney that she tried to tell Kourt’s ex Scott Disicknot to post a throwback photo on Instagram of the couple making out as a tribute to her birthday.

Siri yavuja kufungiwa kwa Dkt. Mwaka

HATUA iliyochukuliwa ya kufungia kituo cha tiba asili cha tabibu Dk. Juma Mwaka ‘Foreplan’ pamoja na vituo vingine viwili, kumesukumwa na maslahi binafsi, anaandika Regina Mkonde.

Baraza la Tiba Asili na Tiba Mbadala nchini limelalamikiwa kuchukuwa hatua hiyo kutokana na kuwepo kwa msukumo wa binafsi ya baadhi ya watumishi wa baraza hilo na kwamba, sababu zilizotolewa ni za ‘kipuuzi’.

Pia imeleezwa kwamba, hatua hiyo ni juhudi za kurudisha nyuma ama kukwamisha kwa makusudi juhudi za waganga wa Tiba Asili.

Hayo yamesemwa leo na Mohamed Matokeo, Mwenyekiti wa Baraza la Waganga wa Tiba, Ushauri na Utafiti wa Dawa Asili Tanzania (Bawata) wakati akizungumza na waandishi wa habari leo jijini Dar es Salaam.

“Bawata tukiwa chombo huru cha waganga wa tiba asili, tunasikitika sana utendaji kazi unaofanywa na Baraza la Tiba Asili na Tiba Mbadala ambacho ni chombo cha kiserikali kilichopewa mamlaka ya kusimamia taaluma hii na kuiendeleza,” amesema na kuongeza;

“Lakini baraza hilo limekuwa ni chombo kinachorudisha nyuma fani ya tiba asili hapa nchini, kwani limekuwa likikwamisha kwa makusudi juhudi za waganga wa tiba asili walioonesha ufanisi katika kutoa huduma ya tiba asili.

Imekuwa kawaida kwa baraza hilo kuitisha au kuwafungia waganga wa tiba asili na vituo vyao kwa sababu zinazoonekana ni za kibinafsi.”

Matokeo ametoa mfano wa tukio lililotokea jana la kufungwa kwa baadhi ya vituo vya tiba asili ambapo amesema kuwa, wahusika walifungiwa pasipo kupewa nafasi ya kujitetea na au kuhojiwa.
“Sisi bawata tunapinga hatua hii ya kiuonevu kwani wametoa maamuzi ya kuwafungia bila ya kuwahoji wahusika, tena hawa ni waganga halali kisheria wamesajiliwa na wanalipa kodi vizuri,” amesema.

Sharifu Karama, Katibu Mkuu Taifa wa Bawata amedai kuwa, kuna baadhi ya watumishi wa afya wanaojishughulisha na uuzaji wa dawa za tiba asili kwamba ndiyo wanaochochea kukandamizwa kwa masilahi ya waganga wa tiba asili nchini.

“Kuna baadhi ya watumishi wa afya wanauza dawa za tiba asili katika Hospitali ya Taifa ya Muhimbili, ambapo kwenye jengo la serikali.

“Kutokana na hali hiyo, Bawata tunaamini kwamba, baraza la tiba asili na tiba mbadala linaongozwa na waganga wa kisasa na kwamba tuna taarifa kuwa, kuna baadhi ya viongozi wa baraza hilo nao wanauza dawa asili kwa hiyo wanalitumia baraza kutimiza hadhma yao,” amesema.

Hata hivyo, Foreplan ilianza kuwindwa na Hamis Kigwangala, Naibu Waziri wa Afya baada ya kufanya ziara ya kushtukiza tarehe 15 Desemba mwaka jana na kuibua maswali mengi.
Ziara hiyo ilihitimishwa kwa kutolewa siku saba za uchunguzi na kwamba, kinachofanyika sasa kinatajwa kuwa ni matokeo ya ‘dhamira’ iliyooneshwa baada ya ziara hiyo

Mfanyabiashara Anayedaiwa Kujipatia Milioni 7 Kwa Dakika Afikishwa Mahakamani Na Kusomewa Mashitaka 199

Mfanyabiashara Mohamed Mustapha (anayeongea na simu) na wenzake, wakiwa katika Mahakama ya Hakimu Mkazi Kisutu, Dar es Salaam jana kukabiliana na tuhuma za kuibia Serikali kodi ya Sh milioni 7 kwa kila dakika kwa kipindi kirefu.

Hatimaye mfanyabiashara aliyetajwa na Rais John Magufuli kuwa amekuwa akiibia Serikali takriban Sh7 milioni kwa dakika, amepandishwa kizimbani na wenzake wanne na kusomewa mashtaka 199, wote kwa pamoja.

Mfanyabiashara huyo, Mohamed Mustafa Yusufali na wenzake Alloyscious Gonzaga Mandago, Isaac Wilfred Kasanga, Taherali Sujjauddin Taherali na Mohamed Seif Kabla, walipandishwa kizimbani na kusomewa mashtaka hayo jana katika Mahakama ya Hakimu Mkazi Kisutu.

 Washtakiwa wote kwa pamoja wanakabiliwa na mashtaka ya kughushi, kuwasilisha nyaraka za uongo kwa mamlaka za Serikali, utakatishaji fedha na kuisababishia Serikali hasara ya zaidi ya Sh15 bilioni.

Katika ya mashtaka hayo, Yusufali maarufu kwa majina ya Mohamedali, Choma au Jamalii anakabiliwa na mashtaka 198 yeye peke yake huku wenzake wakikabiliwa shtaka moja la utakatishaji fedha.

Kutokana na wingi wa mashtaka hayo, waendesha mashtaka wawili; Wakili wa Serikali Mwandamizi, Shadrack Kimaro na Wakili wa Taasisi ya Kuzuia na Kupambana na Rushwa (Takukuru), Leonard Swai walilazimika kubadilishana ili kuwapa muda wa kupumua.

Kutokana na kukabiliwa na kesi ya uhujumu uchumi na shtaka la kutakatisha fedha, washtakiwa hao hawakutakiwa kujibu lolote kwa sababu mahakama hiyo haina uwezo wa kusikiliza kesi hiyo isipokuwa Mahakama Kuu na kulingana na mashtaka yanayowakabili, hayana dhamana.

Baada ya kumaliza kuwasomewa mashtaka hayo, upande wa mashtaka uliieleza Mahakama kuwa upelelezi wa kesi hiyo haujakamilika.

Hivyo, Hakimu Mkazi, Huruma Shahidi anayesikiliza kesi hiyo aliamuru washtakiwa wapelekwe mahabusu hadi Julai 25, kesi hiyo itakapotajwa tena.

Kabla ya kupandishwa kizimbani, Yusufali alitajwa na Rais Magufuli kuwa ana mashine inayotoa risiti za kielektroniki (EFD) nje ya mfumo wa Mamlaka ya Mapato Tanzania (TRA) na kuzisambaza kwa wafanyabiashara wengine, hivyo kujiingizia Sh7 milioni kwa dakika.

Rais Magufuli alieleza kuwa mtandao wake unawashirikisha watumishi wa TRA na Wakala wa Usajili wa Kampuni (Brela), hivyo kuisababishia Serikali hasara ya mabilioni ya shilingi.

 Katika mashtaka hayo, Yusufali anakabiliwa na mashtaka 181 ya kughushi, mashtaka 15 ya kuwasilisha nyaraka za uongo, udanganyifu katika kulipa kodi moja, shtaka moja la kuisababishia Serikali hasara ya Sh15,645,944,361, huku shtaka moja tu la utakatishaji fedha ndilo likimhusisha na wenzake.

Waendesha mashtaka hao walidai kuwa mfanyabiashara huyo alikuwa akighushi nyaraka za kampuni mbalimbali, kuonyesha kuwa zimesajiliwa na zinaendesha  shughuli zake nchini kihalali wakati akijua siyo kweli.

Pia, walidai kuwa mfanyabiashara huyo alikuwa akiwasilisha nyaraka za uongo TRA.

Kuhusu shtaka la kutakatisha fedha, upande wa mashtaka ulidai kuwa washtakiwa hao kwa pamoja kati ya Machi 2011 na Januari 2016, walitakatisha Sh1,895,88500 kwa kujifanya kuwa ni malipo ya  mikopo waliyoipokea kwa watu mbalimbali.

Upande wa mashtaka ulidai kuwa kati ya Januari 2008 na Januari 2016, mfanyabiashara huyo alifanya udanganyifu katika kuwasilisha kwa Kamishna Mkuu wa TRA taarifa ya uongo ya marejesho ya mapato, hivyo kuikosesha Serikali mapato ya kodi ya VAT zaidi ya Sh15.6 bilioni.

When Should You Say 'I Love You'? .

With so much conflicting advice, it can be hard to trust your feelings.

"The regret of my life is that I have not said 'I love you' often enough." — Yoko Ono

Hearing a partner say "I love you" for the first time is regarded as one of the highlights of a romantic relationship. However, people are often uncertain about when to declare their love, and whether to be the first to do so or to wait until the other has given an indication that they feel the same way. Is there a best time to reveal your heart? Does the timing make any difference, or all the difference?

When should you say it?

"You don't have to have a ring on your finger to say, 'I love you.'" — Tyra Banks

Romantic love expresses our genuine attitudes. Revealing our loving heart to a partner is immeasurably valuable for communication and personal flourishing. However, such self-disclosure makes you more vulnerable and may put your partner in an uncomfortable situation, especially if his or her attitude is different from yours. Consider, for example, this common (and conflicting) advice about when to tell your partner "I love you":

• Go on at least five dates.
• Say it only after two months.
• Don't wait too long.
• Wait until you're absolutely bursting.
• Do not do it before, after, or during sex.
• Don't say it when you're very emotional and cannot think rationally.
• Don't say it when you want to reward your partner for something.
• Never say it first, and don't echo it back until you've spent some extended time together.

These examples emphasize the importance of timing. However, is timing more important than honesty and self-disclosure? More plausible advice assumes that there is no precise formula for when to say "I love you," and that you should say it whenever you feel that way, without making too many calculations about timing.

Source: Anna Demjanenko/Shutterstock

What's important in long-term love is not timing, which refers to a specific temporal point, but time. Time has a wider reference, including duration, frequency, and development. Accordingly, a few apparent mistakes along the road, stemming from bad timing or political incorrectness, will not change an entire romantic picture. It may even enhance trust and honesty between lovers. Since profound love needs time to develop, it isn't reasonable to say "I love you profoundly" after being together for just a brief time; that may indicate that you are not serious about what is in fact a serious matter. However, since love at first sight can occur, you can say "I love you" after a short time together if you are just expressing what you feel at that moment. You may add, if this is indeed the case, that you see great potential for the relationship to grow. We can perceive potential, but we cannot perceive its inevitable implementation (Ben-Ze'ev, 2014).

In profound love, it is activities, rather than words, that count most. There may be many reasons for not saying "I love you" that are not necessarily because of a lack of love. When Tevye, in "Fiddler on the Roof," asks Golde, his wife of 25 years, whether she loves him, she is surprised at the question and wonders whether he is upset or tired. “Go inside, go lie down! Maybe it’s indigestion,” she says. When Tevye insists on being answered, Golde says: “For 25 years, I've washed your clothes, cooked your meals, cleaned your house, given you children, milked the cow. After 25 years, why talk about love right now?” And when he continues to insist upon receiving an explicit answer, she finally says: “I suppose I love you.”

Different paces 

"It's not easy to sit down and open yourself up and say, 'This is how much I love you,' you know? It's scary to do that." — Jason Isbell

When one is sincere, confessing one's love is typically not problematic. There may be a problem, though, in expecting a reciprocal answer to the declaration. This difficulty derives from two major aspects—the different paces at which love develops and the different personal tendency to reveal one's heart.

Not everyone develops love or expresses it at the same pace.

In addition, there are indications that gender differences play a part: Men tend to confess love earlier than women, and are happier than women when receiving confessions of love from a partner (Ackerman, et al., 2011). According to one survey, men take an average of 88 days to tell a partner "I love you," compared to a woman's 134. Moreover, 39 percent of men say "I love you" within the first month of dating someone, compared to just 23 percent of women.

Personality differences also cause people to fall in love at different paces. These paces do not, however, indicate differences in romantic commitment—the one who falls in love more quickly might also be the one who will more quickly fall out of love. In addition to the different paces at which love develops, there are also differences in the pace at which partners express love: Shy people tend to express love later than outspoken people, even when their level of love is similar. One shy woman told her partner, who had confessed his love to her: "Don't weigh my words now; weigh my deeds."

And she was right: Deeds speak louder than words.

In light of all these differences, one common piece of advice is that lovers should reveal their love only when the other feels the same as them and is also ready to express it. As one young woman said:

"We got married when I was 19 and I married him knowing that I didn't love him. Later on, I was discussing my ex-husband with my current husband and he asked me why I ever even told my ex that I loved him. All I could say was that he said it first and it seemed like the nice thing to say in response."

It is not part of romantic etiquette to tell someone that you love him just because he has declared his love for you. It is, in fact, probably best not to respond by saying. "I love you too," but rather to say that although right now you do not know whether you love him, you do know that you like him a lot, that you want to get to know him better, and that you want to give the relationship a chance to develop further. It does not have to be love at first sight. Another, less preferable option is to postpone discussing the issue of love and simply enjoy the (presumed) bliss of ignorance (Ben-Ze'ev, 2014).

Love does not grow at the same pace in all of us. While it is true that profound romantic flourishing involves mutual loving attitudes, this does not mean that you should hide your love just because your beloved is not (yet) as in love with you as you are with him or her. You should be honest and open about your attitude and give your partner the time he or she needs for feelings toward you to develop into profound love. The development might be gradual. It might reveal itself in "softer," more indirect expressions of love, such as calling you "My love," or saying "I send you my love," or "I love what I see in you," until, finally, the direct declaration "I love you" might be spoken.

The fact that one goes slowly does not indicate that one is not still advancing, or that one is less committed to the journey than the person who gets there faster—often, in reality, the opposite is true. We should respect different personalities and not expect our partner to feel and express the same things we do at the same time. Profound love is for the long term, and so it is possible that sometime in the future, both lovers will feel profound love and be able to reveal it. Rushing to achieve an unripe romantic profundity is often harmful—patience and calmness is the name of the game.

When should you say "You are the love of my life"?

"I love you—I am at rest with you—I have come home." — Dorothy L. Sayers

Much of the above also applies to other expressions of romantic intensity, such as "You are the love of my life" or "You are my greatest lover." Such expressions create a ranking between past and present partners, making the declaration even more complex, as it involves not merely the two lovers, but also others from the past. If, for example, you tell your partner, "You are the love of my life," you should not be insulted if he or she does not reciprocate by saying the same about you. In addition to the issue of the difference of paces at which love grows for different people, there is the problem that each case of love is different, and making comparisons between them is often impossible, or even destructive. One love affair might be very passionate, another more profound, and a third a kind of companionate love. Even if comparisons can be made, the fact that your beloved's first love, many years ago, was and remains his or her greatest love does not diminish his or her love for you—the circumstances of the relationships are different and you may encompass many good qualities that were absent in the former partner. In any case, your relationship is unique and a genuine comparison, even if it is possible, is of little value.

In light of the comparative concern involved in saying "You are the love of my life," receiving a reciprocal answer may actually take longer than in the case of "I love you." Don't hold your breath until you hear this declaration from your partner—it may take a long time. You may hear it only in the last days of his or your life, or you may not hear it at all.

In the end, it does not matter who says "I love you" first, or who says it more frequently, just as it does not matter whether you are the first or the second on your partner's romantic and sexual list. What matters is the profundity of your relationship and the way it develops. Timing and ranking are of no concern—depth and flourishing are what count. In light of the above considerations, in many circumstances an appropriate response to a declaration of love might be "I think I love you, but I can't be sure whether it is profound love until we've been together longer." 

References

Ackerman, J. M., Griskevicius, V. & Li, N. (2011). Let's get serious: Communicating commitment in romantic relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 100, 1079-1094.

Ben-Ze'ev, A. (2014). Ain't love nothing but sex misspelled? In C. Maurer, T. Milligan, and K. Pacovská (Eds.), Love and its Objects. London: Palgrave Macmillan, 25-40.

Roma Mkatoliki Ampa Makavu 'live' Babu Tale Kwenye Nyimbo yake Mpya

Msanii Roma Mkatoliki ambaye leo ameachia ngoma yake mpya 'Kaa tayari' amefunguka na kusema moja ya mstari uliopo kwenye wimbo wake huo unamuhusu meneja wa Diamond Platnumz ambapo unamchana kuwa saizi anamganda sana Diamond Platnumz
mpka amelisahau kundi lake na Tip Top Connection.

Roma Mkatoliki amedai kabla ya wimbo huo haujatoka aliweza kusimkilizisha Babu Tale kisha Bab Tale alimchimba mkwara kuwa usipofuta huo mstari wimbo wako hautatoka, Roma aliongea huku akiwa anacheka kwenye kipindi cha Planet Bongo ya East Africa Radio.

Kwa upande wake Babu Tale aliibuka kwenye kipindi hicho na kuja kujibu tuhuma hizo na kusema yeye hajalisahau kundi hilo kama ambavyo Roma Mkatoliki alivyoimba bali anadai wao wana mipango, ndiyo maana alianza kuja Madee na Miguru pande, akaja Dogo Janja na 'My Life' na baadaye atakuja Tunda Man, hivyo hajalisahau kundi hilo kama alivyosema Roma Mkatoliki kwenye wimbo wake huo.

"Unajua saizi Babu Tale ni meneja mkubwa Afrika, nimemzidi Roma Mkatoliki kwa kila kitu, nimemzidi followers, busara, hadi dhambi nimemzidi, hivyo Roma Mkatolik mimi nadhani ameimba huo mstari kwa kuwa anajua mimi ni mtu mkubwa hivyo alikuwa anataka wimbo wake uweze kufanya vizuri ndiyo maana akanichana mle, japo alichoimba hakina ukweli" alisema Babu Tale.

Kwa upande wa Said Fella alisimama upande wa Roma Mkatoliki na kudai alichoimba Roma Mkatoliki ni maneno ambayo hata mtaani yapo kwani watu wamekuwa wakisema kuwa viongozi hao saizi wameyasahau makundi yao ya zamani.

"Unajua Roma ni mtu mzima, alichoimba hata mtaani huko watu wanasema, na unaweza kuona labda Roma ameambiwa hayo maneno na msanii kama Madee au msanii mwingine yeyote wa kwetu, lakini hata mimi nilishawahi kumwambia mdogo wangu Babu Tale kuwa tufanye yote lakini yeye asiisahau Tip Top Connection na mimi nisiisahau TMK" alisema Said Fella.

Hizi ni njia Tatu zinazoweza Kusaidia Mahusiano yako Kudumu Kwa Muda Mrefu...

Mahusiano mengi yamekuwa yakivunjika kwa kushindwa kudumu kwa muda mrefu kutokana na kila mtu kumchoka mwenzake. Unaweza kuwa katika uhusiano kwa muda mrefu na kamwe usichoke kumwona au kutaka zaidi kutoka kwa mpenzi wako.

Hizi ni njia tatu zinazoweza kusaidia mahusiano yako kudumu kwa muda mrefu:

Geuza mtazamo wa mapenzi

Unapaswa kutumia kila nafasi unayoipata kufanya mapenzi kama nafasi ya kumuonyesha kitu kipya mpenzi wake – Mwisho utagundua kitu kutoka kwa mpenzi wako huyo!

Jitahidi kusoma na kujifunza njia mpya kwa ajili ya kumfurahisha mpenzi wako hali itakayopelekea kumlinda mpenzi wako asitoke nje ya mahusiano yenu.

Watu wengi wamezoea kuwa mwanaume ndio kiongozi wa kila kitu, hali iliyopelekea mpaka wanawake wengi hawezi kumuambia mtu wake kuhusu kufanya ‘tendo’ mpaka mwanaume ndio aanze kusema. Hilo kwenye mapenzi ni kitu ambacho kinapaswa kuwekwa kando ili kuleta furaha kwenye mapenzi yenu.

Tafuta ushauri

Kuna mbinu nyingi ambazo wapenzi hudhani wanazijua, lakini ni njia moja ya kuhakikisha kuwa mapenzi yananoga kila siku ni kutafuta mbinu mpya na za kipekee.

Wapenzi wengi wamekuwa waoga kuomba ushauri kama kuna matatizo ndani ya mahusiano yao, hali inayopelekea mtu huvumilia matatizo hayo mpaka mwisho wake huamua kulisaliti penzi lake kwa kutafuta furaha kwa mtu mwingine.

Kwenye mapenzi siyo kila rafiki wala mtu wako wa karibu anaweza kukupa ushauri mzuri utakaokufaa – Kuna wengine watakushauri vibaya ukajutia maamuzi yako hapo mbeleni. Unaweza kuwafuata watu waliodumu kwenye mahusiano kwa muda mrefu wakiwa na furaha na kuweza kuomba ushauri kujua wamefanyaje mpaka kufikia hapo ili uweze kufikia malengo na mpenzi wako.

Jua vitu anavyovipenda/ havipendi mpenzi wako

Unapaswa kuvijua vitu ambavyo havipendi mpenzi wako ili kujiepusha na kumkwaza mara kwa mara ili hata ikitokea hivyo ujue kwa wakati huo yupo kwenye ‘mood’ gani.

Aidha wapenzi wengi wamekuwa hawa fahamu sehemu za wapenzi wao zinazowasisimua na kupandisha raha au kumfikisha ‘kileleni’. Hali hiyo imepelekea wapenzi wengi kushindwa kudumu kwa muda mrefu kwenye mahusiano yao.